50-48 #13: EMERGENCY UPDATE—THE FIREWORKS GOING OFF ALL AROUND MY HOUSE, LIT BY DRUNKEN LSU SUPPORTERS, ARE SCARING THE EVER-LIVING CRAP OUT OF ME

(Originally published 1/8/08)

50-48 #13: EMERGENCY UPDATE—THE FIREWORKS GOING OFF ALL AROUND MY HOUSE, LIT BY DRUNKEN LSU SUPPORTERS, ARE SCARING THE EVER-LIVING CRAP OUT OF ME

Good news, everyone! A team proven inferior to the Arkansas Razorbacks just won college football's national championship, thus making the Hogs de facto national champions! How does it feel?!?! Are you ordering rings?!?! WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!!!!!!! WOO PIG SOOIE!!!!!!! (PS: There really are fireworks going off everywhere in my neighborhood. Never fear. I will beat back the chest-thumping braggadocio and keep it from penetrating the Arkansas border.)

And also, there is one more bit of information that I did not provide last time: On Thursday, the Ladyback women's basketball team will be taking on LSU in Bud Walton Arena. After the long overdue firing of Susie Gardner, the Ladybacks are undefeated and ranked, meaning that all of you on The Hill have a chance to see Top 25 basketball action on Thursday! You all know that I would be there two hours early if I were in Fayetteville. I am not. Therefore, I call on 50-48 members to show up and cheer on the Ladybacks against the Tigers on Thursday night. C'mon. It'll be fun! You can even make Rightful-National-Champion football banners if you want! Sylvia Fowles is a she-monster, but our undefeated girls aren't going to be the pushover they've been in the past. GO HOGS GO!

So, to sum up: 1) Ladybacks v. Tigers, Thursday night. You should go. And 2) The Arkansas Razorbacks are the de facto national football champions! Remember this score, Old Lou? (op cit below)

50-48
Fuck Texas
WPS